Monday, May 28, 2007

Everything is quite different now. I sit alone in the shade of my tent with familiar objects arrayed about me. And yet I am not alone, and yet nothing is familiar.

I lost a tooth tearing muscle from dead Radagast's femur. I found his insides not unlike a Man's or an Elf's. But by the time I had finished his heart, a new set of canines and other sharp teeth besides had grown in my jaws and I had no difficulty with the rest of the meat. Despite all the meat I had eaten during the day, as I devoured the Wizard I only seemed to grow hungrier. It seemed there was a fire that, as it grew larger, demanded more fuel. I ate near the centre of camp, to demonstrate to the Orcs, but I had all but forgotten my environment and those in it. As I finished, I found myself aware of each Orc, Uruk-Hai, troll, Warg, and Crebain about me. I felt their fear and their awe wash over me like sheathes of blue flame.

The Crebain are no longer mysterious to me. There was a cancer in their ranks, but now I touch all their minds, and I watch through all their eyes, for miles and miles. I saw the Grey Girl Beast, sleeping naked in my cloak, curled around her own fear. I smiled. I feel no need to take her now. She is in Mordor, and so long as she is, she is ever in my grasp.

My attentions now are on the disparate Orc tribes of Gorgoroth. In each individual goblin and Uruk, I have sounded the tiny bell, and they are all now massing about me as a great maelstrom. I can feel the Black Easterling, and he is coming to me as well, though I do not know his intent.

As I sit now in my dark tent, at times I can see the flames lick my arms and legs, illuminating nothing, but glowing fiercely. I have just finished sewing a mask from the Wizard's skin, and I am affixing it to a helm. My mind's eye now is often on the Grey Girl Beast's heart, and I delight to see a dark path through which my will may enter. I shall wait and I shall watch her.

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