"Way Down . . . Below the Ocean . . ."

Thinking about Lady Gaga's habit of calling her fans "Little Monsters", it occurred to me maybe I was wrong to see it as offensive. Maybe people like being talked down to. So I've decided to try referring to my readers as "Little Shoe Shiners," in reference to Billy Batts from Goodfellas. Now go home and get your shine boxes.

What are you getting all offended for? I'm just breaking your balls.

I wonder how many people know that the real Captain Morgan--Henry Morgan, the English pirate for whom the rum was named--died from cirrhosis of the liver. I learned this from a chapter in my history text book on English colonies in the West Indies. I've been outlining the chapter yesterday and to-day for the group project I'm working on. I'm really bad at outlines. So far it's just been a list of facts. I'm basically just removing facts from the narrative batter to render them in a drier, less digestible form.

I watched The Daily Show with lunch to-day because I wanted to see Howard Stern's appearance and seeing the clips of rich Wall Street assholes talk about how the economy's suffering because of those evil, greedy teachers, I couldn't help being reminded of that wealthy seven percent of white sugar plantation owners in Barbados and their thousands of slaves.

Here we are with an increasing divide between the super rich upper class and an impoverished lower class. I wonder what effect crippling the education system will have? Eh, Little Shoe Shiners? Aren't hierarchies wonderful?



Twitter Sonnet #238

Grey chickens want to talk about blue dye.
Rocket propelled eggs are prone to break fast.
Unborn chicks ought to avoid the red eye.
There's always a guy looking for breakfast.
Chagrined Catwoman carries stoned cohort.
Creepy Rooster summons girls by first name.
For Huge Jack many words must one contort.
Now here's Bob Hope of Haunted Mansion fame.
Haunted highways have slimy speed limits.
Simple crisps recline in salt negligee.
Redwoods revere the man called Jimmy Smits.
Larches choose a virginal protégée.
Sapling saps accept spoiled molasses.
Foil flowers by Doctor Parnassus.