Mortimer's Horrible Reanimation

Twitter Sonnet #127

Strawberry's haemorrhaging from the yoghurt.
Coffee clouds roll black in porcelain crater.
Floor's sticky with linoleum alert.
The fake 50s food always comes later.
The virgin pillow bride wore a white gown.
Easter candy fills an hour abscess.
Wal-Mat's chocolate bunny sickens a town.
Jehovah locked up His magic princess.
Lounging senators guard limes and salsa.
Suddenly there are only old cups here.
Barbaralla's come too late for NASA.
A singing tugboat has no real world peer.
You're touching a rodent soul trapped by Faust.
Doomsday will show there's just one kind of mouse.

I was in the middle of pencilling to-day's page when I reached over to adjust the volume on the computer and I found my mouse cursor had frozen. The computer worked fine otherwise, and since the mouse's sensitivity had been decreasing for months, I figured I needed a new mouse. So I went to the mall, where I could get some lunch in the food court and get a new mouse at Best Buy. I figured the ordinary, corded mouse I wanted would cost around twenty dollars, which is what my computer gamepad had cost.

Instead, I found the aisle filled entirely with wireless and cordless mice (I'm not sure what the difference is) ranging in price from thirty to eighty dollars. I saw one ridiculous looking thing with evil green eyes, its name written in a slimy, horror movie font that was difficult to read--it was either "Pathfinder" or "Deadfinder". The only corded mouse--there was only one--was a forty dollar Logitech number. What the fuck kind of scam is cordless mice, anyway? Who needs that much space to move their mouse around? Meanwhile you have to replace the batteries every now and then. For what? Am I turning into Andy Rooney? Fuck.

Anyway, I bought the damn mouse and came back with it to find it wouldn't work. A few frustrating minutes of irritating experimentation revealed it was in fact the port that had crapped out on me. So now I'm down to one USB port, which means I'm going to have to unplug the mouse whenever I want to plug in my camera, iPod, or gamepad. I have a card with USB ports somewhere around here, but it's going to be a couple of days before I time to wrestle with the computer to see if there's room in it for that. The mouse, though, is working great now and it's been a long time since I had a mouse this sensitive at my command. I haven't plugged the old one into the remaining functional port and I'm just telling myself it would work like shit and I still made a good choice getting this new mouse. It must be so.