Fairly Average Girl

I was predisposed to like 2026's Supergirl so it kind of sucks that it's a lousy movie. The negative reactions I saw to the film ranged from the misogynist to the petty. It was weird how many people attacked Milly Alcock's physical appearance, for example. So, even though it wasn't a box office success, I was hoping I could watch it and at least call it an artistic success. Unfortunately, it's a muddled mess with a screenplay filled with nonsensical and frustrating turns.

As a strategy for introducing Supergirl to the new DC cinematic universe, it seems bad. You can see why they'd want to go in a different direction for the character. After a long running Supergirl television series recently concluded in which the character was closer to her traditional portrayal, it's only natural that they'd want to distinguish this new movie version. And sloppy drunken characters tend to be terrific in James Gunn's work, as seen in Guardians of the Galaxy and Peacemaker. But while Gunn is said to have micromanaged this Craig Gillespie film as producer, it still feels more like a weak James Gunn imitation film rather than like a real James Gunn movie. Mostly because, whatever conceptual thing is going on, Gunn's work succeeds because of its fidelity to character development. But this Supergirl movie has too many "so the plot can happen" decisions from its characters.

Why does the evil brigand poison Krypto instead of killing him? So the plot can happen. Why doesn't Supergirl want to help Ruthye stop the brigands otherwise? So the plot can happen. Why are the brigands always carrying kryptonite weapons? So the plot can happen. Why don't we see Supergirl with her full powers very often? So the plot can happen.

That last one is crucial. This is our introduction to Supergirl in this new iteration of shared universe DC movies. It's frustrating to have her hamstrung throughout the picture for the convenience of this lame imitation True Grit plot. And while I like Gunn's sloppy drunks, the great thing about his Superman movie was how he brought the character back to something closer to his original concept after Zack Snyder's Batman-ified version of the character. So this grim/dark Supergirl doesn't feel subversive, she feels like a return to routine.

I do like Milly Alcock in the role. And fuck the haters, she's gorgeous. I think she'd probably make a better Power Girl.

Sonnet 2007

Indulgent lizards play in mudless pools
With piled sand, the tar could never trap
Such problems lead to angry thwarted ghouls
So cops have placed a certain morbid cap
Success has coaxed the shaded eye abroad
No muscle mount could cross the River Thames
Constructed states confused the messy god
We saw this all when playing through The Sims
They babbled 'bout the need to cross the deck
But bed conducts the dream of sleeping dogs
Across the sea of sheets there lies a wreck
'Cause iron spinach wound about the cogs
So now there's just the bones about the bay
As silly watchers haven't much to say