The most impressive thing about last night's finale of WandaVision was how disappointing it was. I mean, it really was impressive for the sheer scale of disappointment--it seemed like every point was covered--everywhere everyone was expecting a ten layer birthday cake, we got maybe half a Skittle instead. In the case of Quicksilver, they pulled a half digested cake out of our stomachs and replaced it with a plastic novelty penis. Yet there were some good things in the episode. I suspect it had the same problem the finale of Game of Thrones had--the creators were so caught up in evading fan predictions, they were willing to sacrifice more logical or interesting story elements.
Spoilers after the screenshot
So we were all excited to see the Evan Peters' Quicksilver appear and suddenly we had an inkling of how interesting this Multiverse thing was going to be. Well, the joke's on us because it turns out it wasn't really a Quicksilver of any kind but some guy named Boner. I guess some people can vicariously enjoy the trolling on a meta level. But it's not even particularly good trolling--I mean, what's the joke, exactly? That people who like Evan Peters' Quicksilver are stupid boys? Maybe it's a dig on Bryan Singer, I don't know. That's all I can think of. My brain tries to rationalise the lameness, maybe it shouldn't. Maybe this was just the best idea they could think of to do with the minimal editing they could effect in the weeks before the finale aired.
I said I liked some things. I like the performances by Olson and Bettany. I liked the apparent reference to Vertigo in the climax with the camera circling the pair while the background changed. The idea of Scotty being obsessed with a dead lover is a little different because in his case she was an actual, living woman. Last night we had confirmation that the Vision in the Hex was a manifestation of Wanda's mind, indeed a kind of masturbation, which I think is a pretty good idea. The fact that she brainwashed a whole community to do it is only a problem if you're devoted to the idea that Wanda is the kind of pristine paragon superheroes are generally considered to be.
That being said, other people on the show digest moral implications really strangely. Monica Rambo (I'm just going with that spelling) completely forgives her, though I don't really see how it's Rambo's place to do so, considering she didn't get it near as bad as the likes of Emma Caufield who was evidently separated from her child by Wanda.
The fight between Wanda and Agatha was kind of neat except it's not clear how Wanda learned how to make those runes--we just know why Agatha told her it's a good thing to know. Wanda asserts the moral high ground by telling Agatha that Agatha committed her crimes on purpose while in Wanda's case it was, at least at first, an action from her subconscious, kind of. I think. What did Agatha do? She killed the witches who were going to burn her at the stake. I guess she did kill Sparky, too. Still, it's all really vague.
Even less clear is why the director of SWORD was arrested at the end. For trying to rescue people from the Hex? For reviving Vision? It seems he made the mistake of simply telling Vision to kill Vision and all Wanda's phantom Vision had to do was say he wasn't the real Vision. So I guess that makes White Vision about as sophisticated as one of Mudd's women.
Well, I'm still looking forward to the Doctor Strange movie, if only because of Sam Raimi. Hopefully management will stay out of his hair.
WandaVision is available on Disney+.
Twitter Sonnet #1449
The pastry chef became a dozen rolls.
A mirror ate the dough and sugar jam.
Excessive toast dismantled heavy souls.
A dryer day delivered fresher ham.
A legend played the roof before the wall.
As bricks repay the flat, the flat implodes.
The curve reminds the bell to rarely call.
A hat above the beard at last explodes.
The empty suit collected letter clouds.
A zombie town's redeemed by purple brew.
The magic's drained for restless, watching crowds.
And things have sucked for witch's captives too.
Like Dragon Mother killed the thronish game,
The theories fail before the mighty lame.